taking back control

Alright, I get it. 3 years ago I started on this weight loss journey weighing in at over 180 pounds...yep, that's right. I was huge and for only bring 5'3", I think we can safely say I was pleasantly plump. I had an awesome husabnd who never once said anything about my weight, he just loved me for me. But I hated me! Same old story of over weight people everywhere, I know. But I took control and I lost weight. Over 50 pounds to be exact and I loved me! I was wearing a size 2 and felt great. It didnt happen over night, it took over 18 months and alot of will power. About the time I was at my lowest weight, we found out my oldest was going to have brain surgery, I was taking classes 4 nights a week after my day job of teaching 4th graders was finished and my world began to fall apart. Food and weight were the only things I felt I could control while the rest of my life seemed to be spiraling downward. I dropped 10 more pounds, but along with the weight, I lost my self respect, my faith and was close to losing my mind. 2 months after the surgery, we lost our house to Hurrican Ike and I started a new job and with the joys of remodling a house, living in an apartment and working the night shift...it's safe to say the weight began it's evil visit back to me. I can blame the weight gain on all kinds of things, but come on, no one makes me open my mouth and eat...no one makes me buy the foods I love and can't stop eating, no one makes me have another drink. I do it. And I am ready to undo it for good! I have gained close to 25 pounds back of the 50 I lost and I will not gain another pound. I don't need or want tragedy to be the only way I can lose weight and I surely don't want stress to be the reason I gain it. I will always have stress. I am a mom, a student and a wife...STRESS! So today I began my journey and I will write about it along the way in hopes that making it public makes me more accountable. The joys and defeats...my slip ups and my accomplishments! I hope to hear from anyone else who is tackling this issue also and maybe we can get through it together. Now I need to get off this couch and go run!